Combine all ingredients in a medium saucepan. Yes, all of them. No secret voo-doo here.
Whisk until smooth. If you see clumps, keep whisking or switch to a whisk-that-doesn’t-judge-you.
Bring to a gentle simmer over medium heat. Do not boil like a witch’s cauldron; we want glossy, not scorched.
Reduce heat and simmer 8–12 minutes, stirring occasionally. Let the flavors mingle without turning it into lava.
Taste and adjust salt, sugar, or heat. Remember: you can always add more, but you can’t take it out once it’s in.
Let cool slightly. It thickens as it rests, so plan accordingly if you’re glazing hot meat.
